Yes I'm back from my travels so your stuck with me again. My thanks go out, once again to No Hope and Blue Harlot for Scribing (won't mention Sucker). Also a big thank you to Barf Wader for doing the impedimenta for the last three weeks.
Returners - shitloads again including Pole Position and me...good to be home!
Virgins - TEN, mainly Frogs, which included a French rugby player who scored the winning try against England...tosser!
DEPARTERS in ...only one ..so piss off!
RUN OFFENSES - Who the Fuck is Alice got all the French in and lined up all the English ( no one wanted to stand opposite the big black Frenchman..and then took the piss out of the English ( well it makes a change, I suppose!). Lesser Dipshit and the Hares in, as Scud was telling all the walkers where to go and not to go...but he wasn't a Hare! He then called in Jaws for pissing on paper( what OUR paper?) Fungus then called in Mind The Gap as he only saw her arse on the Run...so what Fungus best view point on the Run!
RUN SHIRTS - This was a set up! Tootsie got his belated Virgin Hare shirt and his Dad came in to accept Tootsie's 100 Run shirt. But, before he put it on he dropped his trousers to show his real cloth eared elephant..the girls loved it! well done W T F I A! Kiss My Ring got his 50 Run shirt and Make My Day got her shirt for 25 Runs. Oh Yeah matched WTFIA by taking off her shirt and putting on her 50 Run shirt...and the lads enjoyed that, so all were pleased with the shirts presentations today!
1st STEWARD - No Hope. He started by calling in the Hares so he could toast himself..and why not! He did say he was sure to get a Good Run..now that's a step too far! Minnie Mouse, Twice Nightly and Teachers Pet in. He wanted to show all that were not there last week just what these 3 did with their fooballs( so he got 3 balloons and they stuck it up their shirts), didn't make them nice, fat bastards! Fucking Near Water on the ice and 15 Gets You 20 on his lap. This was a Rolf Harris look- a- like piss take. Yes, you do what Rolf Harris did and sure as hell 15 WILL get you 20 (in this case 5 years and 9 months!) All the Canadians in as he felt sorry for them, as their National day is 1st July but is forgotten by the world because of the 4th July and the bloody Yanks! Fungus in next. He told us he never sees Fungus with many ladies around so NH gave out a photo of Fungus with a pretty boy. Questions will have to be asked! Top Off in..but I could not hear as too much useless talking going on. But the circle seemed to enjoy whatever NH said. It was at this point I moved. Always Wet in. NH then gave out another pic..this time of an ABBO with the caption..Immigration..you don't like it...then fuck off! (point made!) Mr Fister and Oh Yeah in. They have just got engaged..well done and good luck. Mr Fister knows how to impress women, with a kiss and a cuddle BUT Oh Yeah knows how to impress a man..walk naked in to the room with high heels on carrying an ice cold beer (and who said men are fools!) 12th July in Northern Ireland is light up your fires time, also light up the policemen too! Lord Louis The Lip in as it is the 50th anniversary of the first Rolling Stones concert... AND LLTL was there but he still can't get any satisfaction!! Great spot NH. Lots of work put it to that, thanks
2nd STEWARD - Blue Harlot. Hares in. Now Singha has had an eye op but how will that help he hear, well not at all but he will help him lip read! SADG in. To save money , when he goes up north he travels by train. He gets a lob on and says to FA Cup, I fancy a bit of sex, so do I she says. They go into the loo but FA C said I have no lubrication. So SADG goes to the buffet car and buys a ham sandwich with mayo on. Goes back to the bog, throws the ham out the window and uses the mayo as lubrication and goes down on her..he then screams out..who the fuck puts chilli on ham sandwiches! Testicle Tom in..someone asked TT, how do you remove a used condom, easy says TT..I just fart and then pull it out! All the Aussies in cos they sent Rolf Harris over to the UK in the 50's. Sky TV in the UK just pulled Animal Hospital off the schedule as it was thought Rolf Harris presenting how to handle a Young Beaver inappropriate! Now BH had been drinking the other night and took a bar girl back to her place. They were getting down to business and she said..come on my tits and BH said yes I saw it when I took your bra off! They were having a dance and she said you smell nice what you got on...a hard on but i didn't know you could smell it! Scud in as it's the matching season in NI and he calls in the Dutch as it's all their fault! good spot BH, thanks.
HARES in - Well No Hope was right in his Steward spot...it is a good Run!
On On, No Hope