Wow! What a day. Excellent laager only there were no swans on the lake, shame! Thank you Once weekly and Twice Nightly, a brilliant run and walk, picturesque, and not too demanding with everybody in within 45 minutes. Beautiful weather, with a cooling breeze wafting across the lakes. (Fucking hell, getting quite poetic aint i?)
     King Klong and Woodpecker really pushed the boat out with a real feast with a great selection of food cooked fresh off the grill and we stuffed ourselves silly and guzzled loads of cold beer thanks to Scrubber and her little helpers. To think that some of you silly buggers went to the Hilton Hotel for a Sunday brunch and paid all that money when you could have come to the Pooying run instead and saved a fortune, and I assure you the entertainment was a lot better.

   Thank you to ‘Hyde the Missus’ who found a big steaming dog turd under my chair, I thought it was Gorgeous who needed a shower.
   At  this stage I was going to give a resume of the jokes and what happened, and then I thought Bollocks, if you really want to know what you have missed, then speak to one of the over 40 people who were there or come and see for yourself. I will give you a taster, one of the cleanest stories and one of the more risqué ones:

  I stopped a man in the high street with my clipboard yesterday and said, "Do you mind if I ask you just 1 question?"
"Go on then." he replied.
I said, "Where did you find my clipboard?"
          (Thanks to Tommy Cooper and that was the cleanest)

Swollen Colon (Or was it Kondyke?) admitted to me that his latest kink is that he likes to fuck morbidly obese woman. Last week he was shagging this huge fat bird from behind, which is apparently the only way you can do it properly with these fat chicks, and he noticed as he was banging into her arse a big roll of fat would ripple up her back like a fucking great tsunami wave and smack her on the back of the neck, and on his final strokes he banged so hard the fat tsunami hit her head with such an almighty slap she nearly lost the meat out of the kebab she was eating. (That got a laugh.)

   Big contributions from Gorgeous who put us all right on how the Pooying should be run, Open Forum slots from Julie Andrews, Whitepointer, King Klong , Great Dick, who was in and out like a dog’s dick and Joy of Dick, Mannequin Pis who wasn’t our Belgium cunt of the week. As we are not sure how many passports he has I think it should be awarded to Julie Andrews (Belatedly) also Filthy Pisshead made it on time today. Minnie Mouse made a presence after completing an early morning 10k competition, consequently she just ate all afternoon, and had the piss ripped out of her. Well done on your 10k. Son of Frankenstein just appeared as dopey as his namesake, but is definitely entertaining.  Photographs taken superbly by Virgin my Arse.

   A naming ceremony for Born Loser’s son who is now officially Loose Boner, and his girlfriend now known as Gota Boner, Lovely.    I can also remember Punt and On the Floor being warned about bringing children on the Pooying, whatever next, I hear you say.

   A great day as I said and only made possible by the people who came along, the G.M.T would like to thank you all and at this rate we will have more people on the Pooying than the Saturday Hash. Mannequin Pis watch out…………?   See you in January.

 Have a very Happy Xmas and safe New Year.

  Bye Bye
The G.M.T