Before
the run, there was a minutes silence to remember Trousers, wife of
former GM
Skirt, who sadly passed away this week - RiP. Hares
in, well one of them anyway (Singha), No Hope was busy dealing with the
Land
Owner - close to being kicked off the Laager site.
Last time PH3 were here there was too much
rubbish left behind. MAKE
SURE YOU KEEP ALL LAAGER SITES
CLEAN AND TAKE YOUR RUBBISH HOME WITH YOU.
The Island is getting smaller without us
loosing Laager sites because of lazy people who don't take their
rubbish
home!!!!!! Anyway all sorted now, but NH you did give some great
mis-directions
to get here, although it looks like most ignored what you provided and
just
assumed it was where it was (could be interesting in the future - never
assume!!). Fungus was iced, he had all
the details for the hash sheet on Monday afternoon, and didn't send it
for
printing until Friday evening!!! So no hash sheet for you to read!! Mr
Fister
was a virgin hare last week, but it seems that he didn't register, so
MF owes
Juan Palorista 60 for last week, and then he can get his Virgin Hare
t-shirt! Announcements: Pooying
run
will be on Sunday 9 December (1
week early) at Mosquito Lake. Check the
Hareline for further details. Run #1397
on 15 December will be a charity run, please bring wrapped Christmas
present
for the kids at Takua Pa Orphanage. There
will also be a cash collection on the day. All
proceeds from registrations will go to
the Orphanage. There will also be a buy your way off the ice!! Returners: 9
of them including; Singha Gold,
Ice Arse and Fuck in a Truck. Virgins: Fye, one of Singha's girls, and she did him
and herself proud drinking her beer, and not flinching a jot when the
ice
arrived!!! Visiting Hashers: Sexy
Safari,
2 Stroke, Virginia Slim,
X-Periment, Montie, Bombastic Belly Bastard. Queen
of Puke apparently can't speak Thai!!!! Maybe she
was just
replying to the GM in the same quality of Thai that he spoke to her
in!?!? Run Offenses: Jiggly
Juggs was not surprised at the un-gentlemanly actions of GM, Houdini
and Punt,
whilst they were all trying to cross the muddy thing!!
They were all pushing and pulling at JJ as
they were trying to cross, and telling JJ to hurry up, unfortunately
here
trainer was left in the mud - not that any of them gave a shit!!
Murkury was
disappointed that the only voice that could be heard through the 1
minute
silence for Trousers was Testicle Tom (way in the background - but
could still
be heard!!!). Top Off did a bit of
slipstreaming on the way into the Laager today - behind Big Bollox!!
Top Off
called in Parasol Pussy (not another bloody chicken??) - no she just
took a
tumble at the start of the run, and ended up covered in mud!! Goldie
was coming
across the last water crossing and just had to wait and see how Big
Bollox
managed it - not very well, as ended up waist deep in the water - much
to the
Hares delight!! Sexy Safari told Bombastic Belly Bastard she couldn't
believe
PH3 would get anybody to sit on the ice - well have a try yourself, you
didn't
pack any spare trainers for BBB (couldn't he have packed them
himself!?!?)
. When Minnie Mouse arrived at the hash,
Sexy Safari asked her if she was Minnie Mouse? Apparently MM reputation
had
been discussed in Singapore! Well, for the record, MM wanted it to be
known she
is a lovely lady (plenty of calls of Bullshit from the circle!). So lovely in fact that as she has new
trainers, Sexy Safari and Bombastic Belly Bastard enjoyed beer out of
them! Houdini iced for gobbing off! GM
visited
Froggy's bar yesterday, Froggy came over to take the order, GM ordered;
full
breakfast with the sausage undercooked and pink inside, fried egg so
stiff you
could use it as a Frisbee and the bread as greasy as possible. Froggy told GM that Barf Wader was far to busy
to cook his food as ordered, GM was disappointed as apparently she
cooked it
just like that the day before! Steward - Dr Fucking Jekyll: Ugandan
Government Minister announced that they are spending $50 million on
defenses -
it will be 20 m high and all round the country! DFJ was drinking with
King
Klong in the Little Expat (KK doesn't recall it!!), and there was an
offer of
some shooters (drinks not the local mafia!). DFJ
declined as did KK, apparently if KK goes off the beer
he deviates
some what - where is quite often a mystery!! A
missionary in Africa was enjoying his work, and was
relishing the fact
that he was going to baptise Rasta! So into the river they went, and
under
Rasta went "do you believe Rasta?" "Yes boss!" Under
again
"do you believe Rasta?"
"Yes I do boss!" Third time under and it was Rasta's Mom that was
asking "Rasta what do you believe?" "I believe this white
bastard is trying to drown me! Two guys
sat in a bar and the one said to the other I haven't seen your wife for
a
while! Ah that's because we had an argument, I took a kitchen knife and
stabbed
her! No way his mate replied, you are lying! No
he wasn't, so he took him outside and into a dark
alleyway where
there was a pile of boxes. In the middle
of the pile of boxes was a woman's arse - is that her the friend asked
- it
certainly is! But why on earth of have
you left her like that? Well I had to have somewhere to park my bike! Twins Big Bollox and White Pointer have done
a grand job with the volunteering over the last couple of weekends. But can you tell who is the happiest buy the
look on their faces! Certainly is Big Bollox he got a free room at the
Dusit in
Laguna!! His wife didn't have breakfast this morning, so he had two!!
Before
Lord Louis the Lip came to Phuket, he was a Rabbi and all the money
that is
collected goes towards the lords work? The local Catholic priest said
that he
takes the coinage and all the notes go towards the lords work. Well LLtL said he throws all the money up in
the air, the lord takes what he needs and LLtL takes the rest! A young lad was starting school, and really
didn't want to go - so his Dad had a chat with him and said that he
needed to
go to school until he was 16 and then he would be able to go out and
get
himself a great job. Still not happy,
his Dad drove him to school on the first day, there were plenty of
tears but
the lad got out and they walked to the school gate.
Off he went to the playground, still crying,
and turned round and said to his Dad "Don't forget to come and get me
when
I am 16!" A rabbit and a skunk had
a head on collision in the woods - when they both came round neither of
them
knew who they were or what they were! So they decided to help each
other find
out; the skunk felt the rabbit and said he had nice soft fur, had a
fury bob
tail, button nose and ears - you must be a rabbit.
The rabbit now happy he knew what he was, did
the same for the skunk, he had a black and white coat, bushy tail, fury
face
with a button nose and stinks like a Paki!! JC
returned from a trip away, and Paper said to him "Can
you tell
me why you have women's panties in your jacket pocket!"
"Yes you are a nosey cunt!" Good
Steward
spot, at times felt like Rosie
was back in the circle ;) Congratulations
Not Cleaver on 50 run t-shirt - he really wanted to 'take it off' but
nobody
else did! Steward - Jungle Balls: Well done
to the Hares, who had one beer for each of the water / mud crossings!
Moonwalker was iced along with Butt Plug (they looked mighty cosy on
the ice
together!). So last week JB was iced by
BP because of a spelling mistake on one of the numbered run shirts!
Well that
was all down to Moonwalker not liking the word cunt! So she was asked
several
times to say it - and she wouldn't. Even BP helped her along with some
ventriloquism
- still not good enough. In the end she
said it loud and clear for everybody to hear (you can go and wash your
mouth
out with soap and water now!). Finally
both of them off the ice and BP removed his hand!! Now for the other
half of
Impedimenta; Clitmas Pussy (this is a true story) - one night before
they
headed off to Australia out of the blue
CP announced that 2 fingers were just not enough, she needed 4!!!!!
This
comment stopped JB in his tracks until CP clarified she was talking
about Kit Kats. JJ was iced, and now nice
and tight 4 fingers
should be enough for her too. Fuck in a
Truck (should have been Shag in a Jag, but she wasn't that lucky!) has
just
landed on a flight from the UK and was at the Laager by 5pm. JC and Paper in bed, and Paper asked JC what
he wanted to do with her body. Obviously
'Identify It' was not the correct answer. Some
current affairs; we all know that the Welsh and
Kiwi's are always accused
of being sheep shaggers, well there are certain countries where this is
actual
LEGAL! Germany, Sweden, Denmark and of course Belgium! The GM didn't
know that,
he is well happy now! Also in Belgium a man has found out his wife was
a
transexual after 19 years of marriage (must have been having plenty of
anal
sex, or shagging a sheep!?). St Andrews
Day yesterday, so obviously Gorgeous joined JB in the circle as he used
to work
as a Pharmacist in Dundee. A young
solider in full regimental uniform entered the pharmacy and opened a
silk purse
and removed a very old looking condom - so old in fact it had bicycle
inner-tube repair patches on it! The soldier asked how much to repair
the
condom, that would be 50p replied Gorgeous. How
much for a new one, that would be a £1. The
soldier thanked Gorgeous, put the condom
back in the silk purse and marched out of the pharmacy.
A few minutes later, there was a huge roar
and cheer from outside and the solider entered the pharmacy again. The regiment have taken a vote and we will
have a new one! Earlier Minnie Mouse got
Sexy Safari and Bombastic Belly Bastard to drink out of her new
trainers. However, little did MM know but
Sexy Safari
was also wearing new trainers, so the favour was returned!
Well actually after some pleading by MM for a
willing volunteer - No Hope stepped up to the plate, as MM was
instrumental in
sweet talking the land owner to allow us to say (and return in the
future!). Although MM still had to
endure one trainer, BBB got most of it on his head!
A new male strip bar has recently opened in
Patong, and Paper, Always Wet, On the Floor and Sadterm were all in
there. They were having a great time, and
Tootsie
was giving them a great 'naked dance' on the table.
He was on his hands and knees, letting it all
swing low and showing off his sweet arse! The
girls thought he was doing such a great job that they
needed to pay
him, so Sadterm was first up, with a 1000 baht note and stuck it on his
arse,
next up was On the Floor with her 1000 baht, Always Wet wasn't going to
be left
out, and had a couple of attempts at attaching her 1000 baht note to
his
arse. Unfortunately in typical JC
fashion he hadn't given Paper any money to go out with, and she wanted
a piece
of the action, so out she took her ATM card, swiped it down the crack
of Tootsie's
arse and took the 3000 baht! Great Steward spot. FCOTW: So last week Who the Fuck is Alice was very disappointed to find out all his daughters were lesbian and the only person to like cock in his house was his son Tootsie! However, having had a week to think about it, there is a positive side to it - he gets free blow jobs!!!! Departers: No Hope, Ice Arse, Major Dick Blue, Tokyo Joe and Bombastic Belly Bastard & Sexy Safari will do anything for a free beer! No Hope thanked everybody that had donated clothes for the families he will be working with 'up North' he has a truck full!! Hares and Run Masters in - with a reminder DON'T FORGET TO TAKE YOUR SHIT HOME WITH YOU AT THIS AND EVERY LAAGER SITE WE USE. Not for the want of trying, JC couldn't get anybody to agree to hash shit (apart from Jungle Balls seeing as he is the current holder of hash shit!!). All agreed Good Run!
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