Well, what can I say, it was all happening today - the weather was atrocious so I chose to do the 'Old Farts' route, a lovely trudge around the dam - not a puddle of mud in sight!!!!  I am surprised I got any notes written, not easy trying to master pen, paper and golfing brolly when there is a monsoon staying put in the Bang Wat Dam area!!!!!! 

So the Hares laid a trail that was very similar to the Tin Man on Wednesday (or did the Tin Man Hares lay a trail very similar to today's walk that has been on the Hareline for months???).  Today we were joined by 52 visitors who were there for Proposition / Wild Wolf / Slimey Limey (I heard that was one of his 11 hash names) Birthday Bash - PH3 members, you choose which one you want to call him, I will refer to him as Proposition as that is his PH3 name.  So the 30 or so of these visitors along with the Tin Man guys didn't really get anything new today??  Anyway GM announced to all the visitors, that this is his circle, you have all got your odd and weird hash habits from your local hash, but just don't disturb this one with them!!! GM decided it would be wise to have a whipping girl as no doubt that the GM was going to get iced because it was raining, same run as the Tin Man, no cover and that he is a 'dictatorial' bastard?!?  So guess who yep, Proposition, we could have guessed that really.  One of the noisy visiting gits in a condom, that looked like Murkury but uglier was iced, didn't stop him talking though!!!  The word is that Proposition thinks the GM is a bit of a dictator (Hitler in fact) and can't believe there is no cover?!  It's the rainy season Proposition, get over it!!!  

Returners:  Naahee Man, Houdini, Chastity Belt, Julie Andrews, Read My Lips and The Bavarian (who is the only guy to have done the 1st three runs of PH3, along with Sir Dubai).  Visiting Hashers (Only GMs, RA, Circle Masters): They were into a bit of self icing.  So HIV (GM of Subic Bay Hash) sang a song about some bloke called Jack who is a necrophiliac and doesn't like to fuck dust!! The second guy is not worth writing about, supposed to be a GM but could only manage "He's a bastard, he's true blue!" Back Door Boy also sang a song, which was about women, but I failed to hear any of it due to the noise of the torrential rain that was hammering down!! I'm sure it was good though??      

Steward - Proposition: Wilma was his beer bitch, and failed miserably yesterday, he forgot to tie the beer to the back of the bus, and yep you guessed it, they went up a hill and off the back it came!? Swollen Colon was late for dinner on Friday night, nothing interesting apart from the fact that he left his lights on and got a flat battery (well that's what he told them).  Flasher nearly missed his plane to get over to Phuket, he got to the airport and realised he had forgotten something, NO not his passport, but his favourite red dress!!! Boner enjoyed sitting on one of the plastic chairs that were strapped to the back of the bus, the fat git broke it, so just launched it into the undergrowth (so the plastic will NEVER rot and break down you loser!!!).  Chicken Shit needed a piss on the way back from the hash yesterday, so when the bus stopped at the petrol station, unlike everybody else who went to the toilets, he gets his 'dick' out and has a piss in the forecourt - nice - NOT!!!!).  HIV emailed Proposition and asked him to pay the deposit on his room at the Expat, Proposition was happy to help, so HIV emailed his booking e-mail and the muppit had only booked himself in a month too late - It is July not August you tool!! Drag Queen or Crusader not sure which one but they were on the bus and the call went out for anybody else, they replied that everybody was on and off the bus went - leaving one of their hashers running after the bus, wouldn't want to be left in the jungle now would we?   Proposition is coming back to Phuket in the dry season next year!!! Naahee Man got called into the circle yesterday but was nowhere to be seen, too busy having a crap! (Dambuster noticed that NM had no underwear on, got eyes like a hawk that one!).   King Klong has lovely rooms at the Expat, unfortunately they come with complementary road diggers right outside the window - so those in noisy rooms have free beer until it stops (don't think that will be coming out of KK pocket - over to you to pay Proposition?). 

Barf Wader was iced for talking - never!!!   GM pointed out again that it was Propositions 50th Birthday Bash, unfortunately he got the year wrong, he is only 49 this year (bit like HIV and his months getting mixed up) - they are both Hashers, so it is allowed to be slightly confused at times.  Chicken George and Nugget are celebrating birthdays this week - HBYC.  Chicken George is 65 years young, the age that most people retire at, unfortunately due to his occupation, a financial advisor, he can't afford to retire!! After that statement he won't be getting anymore work either GM!! Pygmy was joined in the circle by all those that have done over 1000 runs, so Lord Louis the Lip, King Klong and one of the Birthday Bash visitors - who must have started when he was 3 months old!!!!  Huge congratulations to Pygmy, receiving his 1200 run t-shirt, and absolute first for PH3.  Another t-shirt to be handed out, Blue Harlot wasn't convinced that just because it was small and 50 runs, he would enjoy it - but SA Dick Gobbler (being the shallow one that his is!) was all for it.  Congratulations to Bob on 50 runs, who was also iced due to being covered in mud - he seemed far too happy to be on the ice though.  Because Mom (Suzie Klong) wouldn't let him have a beer she also enjoyed a water down down.  Although Blue Harlot reckons he should have had a beer as he is already masturbating (not sure how he knows his, I do worry sometimes!).   Whipping girl asked to sit on the ice to clear off the mud!!   Now, this is the time that Proposition gathered up his pack and left the circle.  Not sure why, was it because; a) it was raining, b) he was referred to as Proposition, c) he had run out of Daz washing powder and his white socks were not so white, d) he was the whipping girl, e) not the centre of attention, f) wanted to throw his dummy out of the pram or g) all of the above.  My own personal opinion (and no others of PH3), is I don't care what the reason was, it was just bloody rude!!!!    So the fair-weather hashers have gone, apart from Chicken Shit and Naahee Man (who we know isn't a fair-weather hasher!) who stayed along with all the other true hashers (I wonder if Proposition spoke to them when they got back, or still had his dummy out of the pram and completely ignored them!?). 

Virgins:  Craig from Creek Hash, Dubai (friend of Tattoo) and Brian from East Side Manhattan, New York.  Run Offenses:  Houston Basher wanted to ice the GM, welcome to the new whipping girl Chicken Shit.  Apparently HB thinks the GM is a dictator likened to Hitler - unfortunately, but not unexpected, HB was not funny, had totally missed the fact that the butt of his 'joke' had pissed off 5 minutes ago.  HB iced and told to be funny next time he enters the circle.  Julie Andrews thought it was hysterical that Proposition asked JC to not make the Sunday morning hash too easy for them - jesus little does he know that Kamala is completely surrounded by hills, and JC wouldn't have made it easy in the first place - be careful what you ask for!!! Chicken Shit and Naahee Man cheered when it was announced that all PH3 members would get a free ticket for the Expat BBQ after the circle - those two dumb fucks had already paid as part of the birthday bash!! We all know Blue Harlot is a teacher, and funny that the Sweetie family have left now, but Sweetie Wurm doesn't miss a thing in the circle (I wonder if she wants to be the next scribe??).  Anyway, BH will have to be on his best behavior now, seeing as she is moving into his class next term!! Visiting Hashers:  Floor Show and Bob Saget from Colorado - passed the intelligence test (blue arms) with flying colours.  Manneken Piss has a cracking shiner on his right eye - apparently some guy owed him money, so he got a black eye instead (and still hasn't got his money!).  Is the PH3 in safe hands next year? Oh well, if you don't pay your registrations on time just thump the GM!  Barf Wader and Chicken Shit iced again - do they ever shut up - errr NO!!! Dambuster looked like a giant green telly tubby (well at least he was dry and warm, which is more than I can say for me at this stage of the afternoon!!).  GM is worried that he too will look like that in years to come, do all previous GMs look like that?? Murkury thanked the beer truck for doing such a stirling job in such terrible conditions (I personally think the Hash Flash and Scribe did a pretty good job too??). Double Down Down nearly started WWIII in the week (according to the GM!), she mentioned to him that there was little interest in somebody volunteering for registrations at Kamala - anyway GM, aka Kofi Annan, sorted it all out, and thanks to Dicksappointing, we have a 'willing' volunteer.  No Hope was still laughing about Pink Sock Hawaiian Ho who was in such a rush to get off on the walk, that 5 minutes later he returned realising he stood no chance of walking round in his crocks!!!   

Hares and the Run Master in, so we have a situation, with Proposition and his pack pissing off half way through the circle, does that make it Hash Shit  for the GM? - huge cheers of 'well done' so take that as no then!  Considering that the run was a 're-run' of Wednesday's Tin Man and Murkury was the Hare Advisor, should it be Hash Shit.  Point of order from No Hope at this point, as the Run Master, JC should be ensuring that this never happens, and the fact that this run has been on the Hareline for months, means that he fucked up - so no Hash Shit for that reason.  So all agreed a Good Run.