Before the run even started Wilma was heading off 'live haring' shouting over his shoulder 'give us a minute' - so over to the GM and Disparu to enjoy a beer out of his lovely new trainers!  After the 20 minute walk (yes that was all it was!) the GM couldn't blow the horn to start the circle as the 'pea' had disappeared!!  Tight Fit kindly volunteered to sell pies as nobody else there wanted too!!

New Member:  Dten, so there were the walkers following ground colour paper on the ground - which really didn't show up very well (which is probably why it was only a 20 minute walk as I reckon we missed some!?).  But Dten spots at 100 paces 20 bath, so thanks to the hare for laying the walk with money!!!  Her PH3 name is 20 Baht Bar Fine (poor girl had no idea what was going on!!).  Somebody reckoned the GM was in with a chance at that rate, too late he had already paid her!! GM did thank the Hare for laying the paper after the terrible weather we have had this week, also nice Laager site with a stage and a swimming pool (can always tell a good Laager site, nice toilets to use - no peeing behind the bushes for the girls!).  JC and Paper iced for being the owner of Spot, who not only was running round the circle driving the GM mad, but had a nice ride out in the swimming pool in her own boat!! Parasol Pussy and Secret Banana Gobbler both iced for also being dog owners - the sign clearly states NO DOGS!   

Returners: Whispering Grass, No Hope, Wilma and Berthless Boatie. Warning BIG A Resort take no responsibility for the steps up to the stage, you use them at your own risk!!! Spot the Dog took a pisser when she missed one of the steps!!   Puppy Shit modeled the latest Green PH3 shirt, if you want one they are limited stock so get in quick.  Visiting Hasher:  Wanking (in the circle) who earlier on was seen modeling the latest in budgie smugglers, who failed the intelligence test miserable but both blue arms were used and it was interesting to see how he got on pulling his shorts up after sitting on the ice!! Testicle Tom could be heard shouting (with enjoyment I think) I can see hair!!!  Virgins: Bret and Ken passed the intelligence test, after thinking about it for some time and Dianne enjoyed 2 down downs! Visitors: No Name (from Koh Samui), Dave, Ray and Samual - oh and then Kee - we weren't sure if she was a visitor or just found No Name inviting!! Birthday Boys in (the really old one!?) Gorgeous, Dicksappointing, Murkury and visitor Dianne - HBYC!! Gorgeous (token Scot) and the Aussies, so can you believe it, after the Scot's were beaten in Rugby by England, Wales, Ireland and even Italy, the Scots only went and beat the Aussies this week - Gorgeous jumping for joy!!  Butt Cycle is NOT one of those people that turn up and try not to pay, he is due some free weeks registrations, but actually paid last week - so asked the GM for a refund, well you are getting it in beer - enjoy your down downs! Gorgeous looked very colour coordinated today, GM even tried to get him for new shoes, but apparently hash flash got a photo of them 3 weeks ago - bit slow there GM.  But his colour coordination does takeaway from the fact that we don't have to look at his face!!  

Run Offenses:  JC got Assterix on the ice - as we know Assterix is not known for checking and actually finding the paper - but bugger me today was a first, he was seen to be checking AND found paper.  There was a chorus of Bull Shit, just can't quit believe it!? Froggy (or Mr French Fries) enjoyed the 20 minute walk around the roads near Big A - but the GM still found him short cutting!! Manneken Pis was impressed with Gorgeous and Google Ass, both over 70, Gorgeous was out on the run and Google Ass was running up the hills still blowing the horn.  MP would be so happy to be as fit as these guys when he is 70 - in fact would be delighted to still be alive!! Barbara Woodhouse had a good old moan (and rightly so) at all those that turned up late for registrations, JC, Paper, Dirty Harry, Jaws, Porn Shop.  Why on earth Jaws and Dirty Harry were late - they are long time hashers and live 1 mile from the Laager site! Clitmas Pussy shared with the circle that Double Down Down is reading a book called 50 Shades of Gray (go on Google it girls!) this book has been nicknamed 'Mommy Porn' - so DDD thinks it is a mighty good read - and it is a trilogy so another 2 books to enjoy :) Apparently DDD has been out buying ropes and cable ties to put into practice what she has been reading.  Rude as Fuck took over scribing and if you read his notes, not sure if they were aimed at DDD or No Name!? You decide; Wanker, Tosser, Loser, Shithead and he even signed it!?!? (So GM, full story No Ice I think the deal was??).  Singha refused to go up onto the stage as was still taller than most when he stayed on the grass!!! So Wilma, Sir Wanda and Singha's two little helpers - Wilma laid a clever run / walk - much too clever for us lot anyway.  Twenty minutes out on the walk, and NOT a scrap of walk paper to be seen (because it was camouflaged with the concrete Singha!) but the girls were out in front leading the way, with Sir Wanda (who has been hashing since Adam and Eve - and Singha can remember when he used to climb mountains, forge streams but wouldn't go to the Tinman because it was raining!) close behind them.  They started going up an incline and Sir Wanda was having none of it - even when the girls shouted On On (although no paper to be seen), SW remained on this downward path - oh how the might have fallen!! Apparently Singha didn't make the Tinman either because he was injured, and then it started raining!  

Steward - King Klong:  How many times GM has a Laager been held at the Big A resort - this is the first time the 'stage' has been used, slipper steps for the silly old farts to contend with - H&S advisor would have a field day - new committee role for next year!? So KK returned to the hash several weeks ago after several months off - and who is the first person that pounces on him, when he hasn't even got out of the car - yes the steward chaser - old Hawk Eye CP herself.  Singha was saying about Sir Wanda's state of fitness, well he has spent 2 weeks in Pattaya staying in Soi 6, went to the Hash Ball, celebrated his 65th birthday, was rained in at Sybil's for 3 days with copious amounts of red wine, but on Friday decided to do something relatively healthy - go speargun fishing with Wedding Ring.  But first a breakfast, so WR ordered a full English with a Tiger beer, SW couldn't face beer that time of the morning, so stuck to vodka! Fungus and Ejackulator did the recce from hell this week, EJ had long trousers on today, but happily showed the circle his copious amounts of wounds, which have got infected (doesn't bode well for the walk / run itself!!!).  Once Weekly in (and Twice Nightly to keep the boys happy) - about 6 months ago OW asked KK to download some music for him, and he gave KK a memory stick.  Fast forward to the present day, KK has no fucking idea where the memory stick is, so uses one of his flash drives, and downloads a bucket load of music onto it.  Unfortunately OW can't play the music in his car, as he can't find where the hole is to stick it in!? Houston Basher was sat in the upper bar, and was ordering 'room service' beer from the Laager - hardened hasher! Although the stewards criticised the steps, they aren't the GMs they are Wilma's.  Good steward spot, shit steps!!  

Jaws and Dirty Harry iced as they have still not paid registrations and will remain on the ice until they do pay! Although Gorgeous did offer to pay 60 baht (but think it included sex somewhere along the way!?!?) Congratulations Rude As Fuck - 25 runs - and you took it off! Google Ass couldn't understand his own name in English - so GM called Monsieur Ass (sounded more like miss your ass - maybe the GM does??).  Congratulations on 200 runs - and congratulations on doing a fucking good job this year as hash horn (shame you have broken it though!) So Gorgeous remembers the time (when he was GM - many moons ago) when he and Jaws went out to do a recce - although Jaws didn't turn up so Gorgeous was out on his own.  So on the Saturday, guess what Jaws was a no show again, so Gorgeous was out on his own laying the paper - gets back to the Laager and Jaws is there "oh sorry, sorry" - he was fucking sorry alright, he got hash shit!!!  Now to lower the tone completely..... 

Steward - Moonwalker:  Oh La La from Assterix!!! Ah note to self (Scribe be careful who you give you notes to when called in!!).  Rude As Fuck and Double Down Down in as RaF couldn't scribe to save his life (see previous comments around 50 Shades of Gray point!!) unfortunately the GM took over this time and wrote: RaF told DDD she was going down on him later (this better be in too!!!) - so GM no ice for me then!! Singha went to the doctors and spoke to the receptionist; "what seems to be the problem sir" she asked "I have a problem with my dick!" replies Singha.  "Oh my sir, you cannot say things like that in a crowded room, perhaps you can be a bit more discreet - perhaps use a different body part and discuss the actual problem with the doctor!?" "OK, I have a problem with my ear" replies Singha.  "Oh dear sir, and what seems to be the problem with your ear?" "I can't piss out of it!!" Porn Shop was our only Thai male at the circle today, so Moonwalker was very conscious that she made sure she didn't say or do anything that would offend anybody.  The other day there was a group of men;  English, Irish, Scot, Welsh, American, Turkish, French, Spanish, Aussie, Kiwi, Indian, Pakistani, Russian, Polish Mexican with various religions; Christian, Catholic, Buddhist, Muslim and Jewish and they were all trying to get into a night club - the bouncer refused them entry because they didn't have a Thai!  (Rosie joke!!) Always Wet had a hot date and visited the chemist and bought 3 packets of condoms, the pharmacist asked if she wanted a paper bag with them and she replied "Oh no, it's OK he's not that ugly!" Another Rosie Joke.  Sir Wanda is interested in paranormal activity and a professor at a university in BKK was giving a lecture on Paranormal studies.  SW was late and took a seat at the back of the theatre, the professor asked: Who believes in ghosts - 90 people, who has seen a ghost - 40 people, who has talked to a ghost - 15 people, who has touched a ghost - 3 people, who has had sex with a ghost - 1 person.  Sir Wanda put his hand up, the professor is lost for words, after all these years you are the first person who has said yes.  SW goes up onto the stage, and the professor asks "tell us what it is like to have sex with a ghost" "Oh shit, from back there I thought you said Goats!!!" Houston Bastard Basher visits a bar and notices a jar full with $10 notes, he asks the barman why the money is in the jar?  "Well you pay $10, and if you pass 3 tests you get all the money in the jar".  HB thinks this is easy money, so asks "what are the three tests?"  bartender replies "you got to pay first before I tell you".  HB has a think, and decides it can't be that difficult so pays his $10 and is told: 1) Drink a whole bottle of tequila in 60 seconds or less and don't make a face. 2) The pit bull chained outside has a bad tooth, you have to remove the tooth with your bare hands.  3) There is a 90 year old lady upstairs that is still a virgin, you need to take care of that problem.  So HB starts with the tequila - 58 seconds flat and not a hint of a face being pulled.  Off he goes outside, and it sounds like blue murder is going on outside, howling, biting, snarling - eventually HB staggers in, is covered in blood and can barely stand.  HB then says "right where is this 90 year old with the bad tooth!?" Paper's dog Spot (who is a Schnauzer) is having problems with its ears, the vet recommends a monthly treatment of hair removal cream to clear the hairs from the ear canal.  So Paper goes off to the chemist and buys some hair removal cream.  The chemists says, "If you are applying this to your under arms, don't use deodorant", "Im not" replies Paper. "Oh, OK if you are using it on your legs no body lotion to be used" "I'm not using it for my legs" replies paper, "Oh may I ask what you are using it for?" Paper replies "I'm using it for my Schnauzer!" "Oh well you don't want to be riding your bike for a week then!" Gorgeous, Mind the Gap and 15 Gets you 20 are all out at a party (could be dangerous Gorgeous reckons!) and the bonny wee scotsman is wearing traditional scottish attire - a kilt! So after a few too many home brews, he heads off home, but passes out on the road.  Mind the Gap and 15 gets you 20 are walking home and see Gorgeous asleep on the verge.  They decide to be cheeky and have a look to see if it is true what they say about scotsmen and their kilts - is he wearing any underwear? He is as naked as the day he was born, and they decided to tie their blue silk ribbon around his manhood! Gorgeous wakes up and needs to pee desperately - he then notices he has blue ribbon tied to his manhood "I don't know where you have been little fella but you seem to have won first prize!!" Dicksappointing visits the hospital and the Nurse ask him what the problem is.  Dicks says "You promise you won't laugh when I show you what is wrong" she replies "Sir I have been a nurse for 20 years, I am extremely professional and take my job very seriously!" Ok he thinks, so Dicks drops he shorts and pants and his willy is the size of a AAA battery - so this is beyond the nurses capability and a smirk comes across her face, and she just cannot stop giggling.  She then realises Dicks is stood there extremely embarrassed and composes herself.  "I'm terrible sorry sir, but I just don't know what came over me, so what seems to be the problem?" Dicks replies "well I am very concerned as my willy is extremely swollen!" Excellent steward spot. 

Sir Wanda is not known for his expertise in singing, so couldn't believe it when the GM showed him a photo from the hash ball with the microphone in his hand.  "Oh my god, what on earth was I singing??" nothing you muppit you were inviting everybody to your birthday bash the next day!! Assterix got a down down for doing what the GM had wanted to do all afternoon - kick spot up the arse!!!! Good lord Wilma had the circle for about 10 minutes, and do you know what, I have no idea what he said - and I thought Dambuster was bad!!!!!  Although Wilma did have some dodgy gold shorts on!?!?

Run Master (JC) in, well great Laager site, but Wilma could have cut the grass as all the grass seeds were sticking to the hairy legs (not just the guys!!).  JC offered Wilma some assistance with this run, as often Wilma's runs / walks are OTT and not up to standard!!  There was a bit of live haring going on at the very start - although Wilma says no! Anyway there was a huge debate about was it Good Run or Hash Shit, as it couldn't be decided JC (as Run Master) had the casting vote.  Hash Shit it was!