| Hares
in; Gorgeous Dicksappointing and Barbara Woodhouse, although BW looked
slightly
unwell, although better than Scud does at the moment!!!
Could be the result of BW being bitten by a
dog last week? For this week only BW
will be known as Distemper! GM liked
this run and good to see BLUE
paper being used for the walk for the first
time. Returners: Ninja Turtle,
Fuck In A Truck, 15 Gets you 20, Black Top, Chicken George, Daves Not
Here.
Some poor reasons why they haven't been to the Hash, but it is all
Froggys
fault that 15GU20 hasn't been as she was busy helping her Mom in
Froggys Bar!
Fortunately for Froggy he wasn't back at this stage to receive his
punishment! Virgins: Butch and Juan.
Butch smoked plenty of Hash just not been on one before.
New
Member: Whispering Grass, dangerous
name to give an Irishman. Visitors: Pucker
Boy, Sword Swallower, Itchy Cunt,
Missionary Position, Crazy German. Plenty
of drinks with blue arms! Ejackulator and Creature FTBL are getting
married in
January, eloping to Chiang Mai (better Hash there apparently?). GM heard EJ tell CFTBL that he is going to
the Doctors to get some 'blue pills' for the Honeymoon. CFTBL replied
"I
will also go to see the Doctor" "why is that" enquired EJ "well
if you're getting that rusty old thing out I will get a tetanus shot!"
GP
Arse iced for having his mobile on in the circle, Flying Dickhead very
lucky it
wasn't him, GM saw him with his phone in his hand, but apparently just
making
sure it was turned off! Things start to happen when you reach the age
that
Gorgeous is, he wanted some of the blue piping, apparently for his
house, as he
has got a leaky pipe. Run Offences: Jiggly Juggs called Blue Harlot in, "Oh Fuck Me" came the reply - obviously he knows why! JJ running along with virgin runner Juan running ahead, BH commented "How does somebody with a fat arse run so fast?" Referring to Juan not JJ apparently! Pucker Boy, a visiting hasher from Sai Pan Hash distributed goods to the worthy; GM duly changed t-shirts but wore his the wrong way round (Blue Harlot was heard saying that he definitely looks like Mr Bean now!) Nothing, who was busy having a shit in the bush, is worthy because he directed the visitors to the PHHH. PB thought the run was great, although slippery as goose shit. Distemper iced! Jiggly Juggs iced for her phone going off, and while she is on there Big Bollox iced for the same thing. TURN YOUR FUCKING PHONES OFF! Getting Singha Gold to do a steward spot is like herding cats, agrees to do a spot, when the bus turns up, he's not fucking on there!!! So when the Steward doesn't turn up, the blame lies with the Steward Raiser; 1st Steward - Clitmas Pussy: Hawaiian Ho should know better than following the shortcutting bastard that is the GM - you always end up further down the back of the pack than when you started! GP Arse, living up to his name again and Butch at the head of the pack, Double Down Down asks "are you on paper" a confused look comes back "er no don't think so" so all the pack head down what turns out to be a long downhill falsie. Only to find out if GP Arse had his eyes open, he would have seen the paper on his original route! Assterix not one of the front runners this week, but when he came to the last downhill, all the walkers were taking it slowly as it was wet and slippery, the runners coming through at a great rate of knots and Assterix goes arse over tit and ends up as the front runner - showing them how it should be done! Itchy Cunt and Always Wet (not a nice combination, sounds like a doctor is needed!). Every week they go out on the walk with the intention to complete the trail - after Always Wet takes a tumble and has a filthy arse the discussion can be heard "shall we go on or just head back and drink beer and eat pies?" Think the beer and pies won! IC and Always Wet were incensed by this - they both finished the walk this week - well done :) Fuck in a Truck didn't hear the first request to enter the circle, been upgraded and only answers to Fuck in a Jag! Well having only arrived in Phuket 2 hours prior to the Hash starting, she can hear voices, but doesn't feel like she is on this planet (welcome to the world of most of the PHHH!) Well done on completing the trail with jet lag! Good impromptu Steward Spot. SA Dick Gobbler wanted to make sure all the Virgins were welcomed into the circle. So into the circle comes Bo, apparently who wasn't registered just helping selling food, SADG duly paid the 100 baht and got her registered. Now he wanted her down on her knees (to drink her beer!) - SADG got an ice cold shower to cool himself off!! When Bo left the circle, SADG shouted "I'll see you later" not sure if SADG heard her reply but we certainly did and it was a definite "NEVER!" No Hope has volunteered to pay for Bo's registration next week! SADG also wanted virgin Juan in, couldn't believe that somebody with love handles and big tits could run faster than him!!! Well done to Jiggly Juggs (and Houdini and Bullet Rash) who completed the Triathlon, JJ did it in 4.05 - GM was impressed that it only took her 4 days and 5 hours! Hash Music: With the assistance of Twice Nightly and 15 Gets You 20 handing out the chorus song sheet to the circle. Minnie Mouse, Pucker Boy, Distemper, Ninja Turtle and Jiggly Juggs who were the subject of the song 'Gonnhorea'. With a chorus of : Piss
off with your troubles I don't want to know
I don't get embarrassed wherever I go I like to go whoring and drink lots of beer And I never worry about Gonnhorea You can image what the song was like - check out the video on the PHHH website. Good music spot. 2nd Steward - Minnie Mouse: A selection of male hashers in the circle and they make everything right in their lives, not because they fuck their wives - but because they always sing "True Blue" - so sing it they did. Pole Position was saying to Clitmas Pussy what a sexy body she has, PP was explaining that she doesn't eat 3 days before a hash, and then only breakfast and lunch! But now her husband is away she is eating all the food she likes, but with an arse like hers does it matter? Once Weekly and Twice Nightly iced - They wanted to know why Cartoon never stays to the circle, 1W and 2N have this fantasy that it is because he goes home to get ready for MM to return and Saturday Night is their 'fuck night!' Well MM explained that he likes to go home and take swim and use the Jacuzzi and that is all, so no 'Saturday Fuck Night' for MM! Paper, 2N, Blue Harlot, Murkury, Creature FTBL, Sir Bollox, Ejackulator, Big Bollox and Houston Basher all in the circle as members of PHHH who attended the 1000th Chiang Mai previously. This is where MM shared a room with Paper and she gets drunk every night, and takes MM out with her, she is a very bad influence! Recently Paper and 2N visited the Chiang Mai Hash and Paper was out drinking every night with Bum Scraper, Paper didn't want to shower, keep her runners or her clothes clean, so BS put Paper's runners outside the room as they stunk to high heaven, but the next day they were gone, never to be seen again! MM gave Paper a shower - at which time BH was getting turned on! GM and Clitmas Pussy always showing their undivided love on Facebook, can always be seen kissing, unlike MM and Cartoon. They must be in a good relationship always kissing and fucking! So last night GM was in bed and farted, and thought it was a good idea to play 'fart football', so at 1-0 up, GM was quite confident he could win this, no chance a quick fart from GP brings it to 1-1. After about 5 minutes GM drops another one, so 2-1 up, however with a giggle from CP there is a double fart and she takes the lead 3-1. GM trying very very hard to win this game, and hopes for a double fart - but he tried too hard and something yellow runs down his legs - CP is astonished and asks "what is that" GM replies "Nothing dear, half time and change ends". So although they like to kiss for Facebook, they also play naughty games! Apparently SA Dick Gobbler taught the GM everything he needs to know about 'fart football' but he does the 'yellow stuff' at 0-0. Blue Harlot and Big Bollox iced for not listening to a word MM said in her Steward spot, as were looking down Twice Nightly's shorts when she was on the ice! Good steward spot, and good to see MM back in the circle. Departers: Arse Over Tits, Whispering Grass and Vomit Bomber. Hares, who are separated by a common language! Run Masterless, so Murkury takes the role - 3 rather different people - although Itchy Cunt reckons they are all Grumpy Old Men. This run was certainly better than the last one that was here - Good Run! Jiggly Juggs finally had her bag and shorts returned to her, although she reckons they are Swollen Colon's shorts as her bag was at his house for the last 5 months, he reckoned he had lost it. These shorts are huge, more SW size than JJ. JJ and Big Bollox 'shared' the shorts, with BB fitting one leg in and JJ getting both legs in! BB will tell his wife that JJ 'bump started' him when she started running! Double Down Down |