Dear Hashers, in the absence of the current scribe, the honorable GM asked me Secret Agent Rat Gobbler to be this Saturday’s Scribe. I tried to pass the buck, but not even the Virgin RA would stand in, instead he asked me to be the RA too. His voice in tatters, this after a confidence building night with the Duke, Yes the ailing Nutcase made it back, just as his friends left, hurray.

For anyone who was not on the Hash, it was simply great, and so I will now go down on some of the gaffs I picked up along the way. The GM calls for the Hares, and Billy Boy spouts, where is the fucking Mexican, everybody is waiting ….in come Murkury and JC. The GM and rightfully so honored the drunks, for a maybe first great run, not a ball buster seriously a great run. GM says that JC is too busy to run round the Dam these days and was seen this Saturday morning, like a good Dad at two schools, and then started laying the paper at 2.30pm. The rumor also has it, that there was Paper getting JC to buy a new house with a swimming pool. Mind you on the advice of the Duke, who like JC drinks with a passion, and when together can’t say no, that’s when it end up a lady showing the way. Cool running Paper, and JC  have you seen the light hehehe.

The GM announces next weeks Iron Pussy run, check info on the website. King Klong with long hair invites everybody to the Expat for Woodpeckers Birthday Party, with Thai Band, food and as I have heard, it went in to the early hours. Then the GM announces the possibility of cheap beers at next Saturday’s Hash, as it is her birthday, so let’s get ready then! Next Run Offences. Cobbler in for getting his balls in to real danger. Booty tells how she seen Duke being led to the bin. This made her stop the guys in their tracks, as it’s obvious, he has already been recycled many a times. Jungle Balls brings in this Doode,  4 years on the Hash with more than a 100 runs, and still no name. So they named him something like Disparoo [Disparu], as he disappears straight after then run.

First Stewart Lesser Dipshit, also known as co-seat hugging Registrar. They use cars to sit on, and so LD called in the worst of the Hash, and that means something these days: Duke the Puke, Tokyo Joe, Thinker bell, and Manic Pies for not paying 60BHT at the Registration Car. Then we had to honor Top Off. They celebrated him due to the two blonds on his arms, and sang to his welcoming the gray age, Happy Birthday you cunt! Then LD called in Jungle Balls, current Hash Flash for taking too many pictures of himself. When LD called in Once Weekly, who looked after his first run like he just escaped Auschwitz, we heard them Hashers whisper, now Once Yearly, ………..running I mean. They shouted Great Stewart spot LD!

Then the GM calls in Creature and Barth Wader due to some bitch fight. Well here is how it goes, Creature alias Stewart Recruiting Officer asked BW again about her Stewart spot, answer: I not confirmed yet hehehehe Billy Boy in and calling the Virgins: Bill from Canada, Tony from England,  Pin Thailand, Schmidt, Joy, John, Katia and Moss. Well they did well, some sucked well and all got cooled down. There was a moment and BB had to take charge, and so he called on Minnie Mouse and Murkury to shut the fuck up. Well, if anybody ells dares saying that to the current GM, I hope you survive hehehe.  Visitors in, Tiffany and Murry got the arm pipe treatment, and her chocolate Balls got well soaked. In the Visiting Hasher, Mars Bar from Brunei, Houdini’s sister. The New Member Off On has been accepted, and the GM reckons she’s a good deal, she does everything for half the price. Some boys we believe are lining up. With the Returners called, they sang we miss you so much hehehe, and so Flip Flop with a lifeline supporting Nutcracker, Kaiser Bill, Crocodile Tears, Corporal Punishment, Numnuts, Copy, Tits for Brains, and last but not least Big Cunt BC are all back with the family again. There are no Departures. The GM thanks Billy Boy for the spot, and for never being there when she needs him.  Hello Kartoon stay a while, the circle is great and she is very popular! Then Top Off throws a fit, calls all FRB’s who never wait for him, short cut all the time and don’t follow the Hash Horn. Then he punished Porn Shop for hiding from the Hash Horn duty, this by doing a JC and simply arrives late. Well, in this case I would call it smart. The GM blows the Hash Horn in to Top Offs ear, and while banging him over the head with it she confessed, that she always feels Indians before anyone need to get one over the head first. Minnie Mouse give it up, their heads will not stop wobbling, and they will drop off!

Houdini in as next Stewart. Hares in, together with Duke and Naked Gun. The latter on a walk, Duke for ¾ of the way was seen in front with FRB’s and Gun comes in an hour after everybody? Confusion did not lift when it was made clear that there was no walk. Then the Irish claiming to be the greatest sporting Nation in the world! Well just because some young Fluke, Duke beat the Pommes. Blast Off, where are you when we need you! Then came Houdini’s stellar moment, he called in three beautiful ladies and BC. BC was confronted with three questions: why would you, Shag the first lady, Marry the second one, and throw the third one over the cliff. After a brief moment of silence he comes out, “I am afraid that Turkish woman, if I throw her over the cliff, she will bounce back”; “That one I will Marry so I can snow cap her mountains’; And Yeah I’ll shag her, and do a Creature on her, steal her just like her boyfriend did. Then Houdini after doing a Rosie ended up on the ice.

At about this time the Hash went off the rails, Elvis took the  circle for a first, a new hit “My Leaking Ars”. Composed by the Bollox  brothers, Fans hang loose it will be on the worldwide Web shortly. King Klong and myself in particular got persecuted, seems that after an exciting night at the annual Blues and Rock Festival, Gim had to carry or drag and carry KK down their Soi to the Expat. Like I could have managed the Soi the stage I was in, hello! The GM announced the Organization for the 25 year anniversary. And so the end was near and Singha in as Run master. Singha made sure we kept the Happy Circle going, only because he could not hear us singing (he always is a cracker in the circle), and so a great, good run was called. Great Job GM,