Scribe Report:                         Run  No. 1468                   Saturday 12 April 2014

Hares: Minnie Mouse, Woodpecker & Dambuster (with J.C. as Cunt-sulting Hare)
Total Pack 114:  PH3 91,  Virgins 9,  Visitors 5, Visiting Hashers 3,  New Members 0.


Can I first thank Sucker and Fungus for standing in for me over the last two weeks (one losing his notes and therefore just making them up and the other writing reams of verse I'm not going to try to follow!) Thanks lads.

With Dambuster filling up the iced water box and FOUR blocks of ice in the middle of the circle, Our Leader opened the Songkran Run circle by getting in the Hares and thanking them.

RETURNERS in...with free shirts there were what looked like millions (cheapskates!)

VIRGINS in...5 Germans, 1 Aussie, 2 Thai girls and someone who had just come back from invading Ukraine! Dr F J and Fungus enjoyed the first of many water throwing, as there was to be more than just the Virgins going home wet!

RUN OFFENSES
...GM got a Thai girl in (Fon) to ask for a new name. A few names were suggested but GM said ok...anything else?....and the poor girl was now to be stuck with....ANYTHING ELSE! After that cock up the GM got Rusty Hook on the ice for taking the piss. Not Cleaver got JC in as the Consultant Hare, just what does a consultant Hare do? JC, who by now was well stuck into his free beers wouldn't or couldn't answer! GM (now in the swing of things), got Root in cos he hadn't been called in all year. Blow Job got in Kaiser Bill and his team of boxers and iced them (brave man!) BJ told us that KB's team had run past him on the walk and had shouted after them, that's the walk not the Run. 20 mins later they had run back saying it's too short so, ran the Run as well (I hate show offs but I'm not going to tell them!)  Manneken Piss got all the French in as Google Ass was checking and complaining about the falsies, that's what you front runners get when you run with the Frogs! Minnie Mouse got Creature and Ejackulator in as they had just walked around the hills, enjoying the sunshine not even looking for paper, that's what happens when you know the area and can't be arsed!

RUN SHIRTS...Tiger was called in to be presented with his 1200 RUN shirt and cap. What a great milestone on Songkran. well done Tiger. Talking about milestones, Not Cleaver was also called in for his 100 Run shirt (in 3 years, sick note!) Whilst MM was putting me in the ice box some twat had wrote all across my note book NOT CLEAVER IS A FAT CUNT! (I see that Jungle Balls was standing quite close to my chair)

1st STEWARD...Minnie Mouse, All the committee in and one after the other we explained what our duties were. Pole Postion was iced cos she couldn't say impedementa (I sell the shirts!) She then called in the Thai Connection, Dambuster, Tiger and Wooodpecker. MM told us of the work they do in helping to convince the land owers it's in their best interests to allow us to trample over their stolen land! MM went on to explain just what Songkran is and means to Thai people. Thai New Year, water, old people, water, friendship, water, fellowship, water, long life for all AND water! MM called in her daughter Gremlin and put her in the ice box along with her new boyfriend from Switzerland and explained the birds and the bees (she's not yet 16!) and told her Songkran is about water! As the GM thanked MM for her great Steward spot he called in Gremlin who in turned called in her mom, MM. and put MM in the ice box to get her own back and explained to her mom about the birds and the bees!

HASH MUSIC...Our old friend and honorary  member King Bongawonga got his wives to line up to dance for their supper and our enjoyment. As King Bongawonga sang, his harem  danced, with Bollox showing us his bollox. The usual laughter sprang out for our Hash Music. A great spot, without water!

2nd STEWARD...Billy Boy started by calling in Born Loser and telling us about their trip to Pattaya on the plane. BL was asking BB all about the plane, look at this, what's this for, as if he hadn't been on a plane before and BL ex RAF too! Now by now it's 7pm and pitch dark and my note book drenched through so here endeth my notes! Thanks for your spot BB.

HARES in...I am told that good Run was called for this 2014 Songkran Run. Thank you and well done.

On On. Not Cleaver
See you all next week.

Phuket HHH
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