GRAND MASTER: Secret Agent Dick Gobbler
Updated Wednesday, 19 November, 2008 8:22 AM
Next Run: No. 1185 on Saturday 22nd November 2008 at 4pm SHARP
Hare(s): Ketchup, Falang Bum, Berthless Boatie and Necrophilia
Misdirections: Mosquito Lake
Costs: Run fees are 60 baht for members and 100 baht for non-members. Registration is at 2.00pm. If you don't want to drive, the bus will leave from the Expat Hotel, Patong at 2:30pm SHARP. Bear in mind, the bus will stop at Ban Rim Klong, Kamala, at about 2.50pm for runs north of Heroine's Roundabout and at the Little Expat, Kathu, at about 2.50pm for runs south of the island. Bus fares are 50 baht return for Thai People, 70 baht return for others. Please consider parking your car at home, Patong, Kathu or Kamala and take the bus.
The Hares' thirst: Continues to be satisfied through the generosity of two of our sponsors. So please take time to visit Island Furniture, for complete quality home furnishers. Showroom is on Chaofa Road West. Also visit Max-Marine Asia, for quality boats at the right price. Showroom is just north of Heroine's on the left hand side. If you are just to lazy to visit, then look HERE and HERE.
Did somebody mumble something about a Xmas Party on 20th December and have the fucking cheek to ask us to bring gifts for the obnoxious little brats they affectionately call "the kids"? If you know the answer to this question, please tell anybody you can find who gives a shit.
The Annual Xmas Run will be held on Saturday, 20th December 2008. Everyone please bring a present (costing not more than 200 baht) for those unfortunate children in the orphanage. Big Bollox will arrange delivery. Parents can also bring a present for their own little ones for distribution at the Hash (bless them).
In Memoriam |
Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here in the site of the laager to remember our Dear Departed Committee Members. It would take too long to number the sacrifices they have made on our behalf over many years if only someone could recall what they were. Sufficient to say "Thank you, one and all". Would you now shut the f$%ck up and join with me in singing the Hash Farewell. "F%$ck off, you c&nts, f%$ck off, you c&nts, f%$ck off, you c&nts, ............
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Vacancies
Following a bout of natural wastage, a number of employment opportunities have arisen on the Hash Mismanagement. Some have been filled but one remains. Members are encouraged to volunteer for this unpaid position.
Haberdasher
Applicants should take account of the following;
1. More than one Haberdasher is allowed AND you do not have to turn up every week.
2. The Hash is a non-profit making organization except for Committee Members, their friends, wives and immediate families.
2. Committee Members must declare their assets. Undeclared assets will be deemed to have been nicked from the Hash.
3. Anyone who has been Wanker of the Week, whose name starts with Flu or HRH and is over 70 is not eligible to apply.
4. Committee Members are not permitted to bonk other Committee Members.
5. Committee Members are not permitted to accept inducements/rewards from Sponsors unless they can be drunk on the spot.
If you are comfortable with the abovementioned, please call Eugen straight away. His number is 087-886-0710.
Movements
A number of movements have been observed. On the occasion of their promotion from the ranks of the invisible, congratulations are due to JC, now Run Master, Twice Nightly and Once Weekly now ON Site Registrars, Ejackulator and Gay Cowboy now Expat Registrars.
Wanker of the Week - No doubt about it. He was at it like the devil himself. Jar of vaseline between his knees and both hands on. One to stop the other from slipping off the end. For actually wanking off before the start of last week's run, Root is this week's Wanker of the Week. To dispel any possible complaints, there is no reason for giving Rosie Wanker of the Week. Completely and utterly insensitive tosspots don't get rewarded. However, they are invited to apologize publicly.
Phuket Laguna Tri/Marathon - White Pointer is not taking any more names for volunteer marshalls and says "Thank you to you all". Check out this page for the latest developments. http://www.thailandmarathon.org/ You can also get info on the link for the Phuket Triathlon here.
